Hello there,

I see an introduction is required. I am involved with a man who has been diagnosed with "Paranoid Personality Disorder", alongside a few other things. It is incredibly stressful, I know little to nothing of the process, diagnosis, whichever, and I have unfortunately been left to deal with it without much preparation. Well, I have finally taken the steps to try and 'educate' myself, hence joining this community.
My partner - John - is on several types of medication, I am not really sure what they are. I have only been with him for four months. Therapy is apparently 'not an option', I have largely left himself to himself to work out how to best handle things - or at least, that was my intent, until recently. Our planned engagement faltered when I realised I had no capabilities of coping with his distinct lapses in self-esteem, etc. It is very unstable at the moment. We are trying to work out how to bring him down from a 'paranoia attack' (I suppose you would call it) more naturally but my attempts so far have been largely unsuccessful.
Hopefully, things will begin to look better.

A book which I am reading right now is called "The Selfish Pig's Guide to Caring" by Hugh Marriott, a gift from a friend; though it is mostly geared towards physical disability, it has been quite helpful with handling personal guilt, etc, and fairly stopped me from just walking away. I haven't had the chance to read it all yet, but I would recommend it.
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I joined this community months ago but I havent plucked up courage to post yet, and have been lurking a little to see what the site was like. Anyway, this is my situation:

30s English female, living in Spain currently, my boyfriend (35) is clinically depressed, has been (officially) for 3 years but has always been not totally stable. Takes an SNRI medication (effexor), has lots of side effects (headaches, dizziness), sees a kind of counsellor here every few weeks, not anticipating stopping the meds any time soon, which worries me because I want a longterm future with him but it is a lot to deal with.  He hasnt made any serious suicide attempts but it is something he talks about and I know it may well happen.
Have had lots of support from other forums but they are mostly inhabited by the sufferers, rather than the people who put up with it all at home. I could really do with friendly ears who know some of what I'm going through.
BTW I am a very private person and really shy so I wont be one of those members that posts every day about every intimate detail of my life, because I just cant do that. I dont have a problem with people that can do that, I admire their openess. I will share factual stuff but I am not so good with pouring out my emotions.

Oh and Happy New Year to you all!
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hi, everyone.

how have your holidays been treating you? ups? downs? bad reactions to stress? good reactions to time off or family?

this can be a tumultuous time of year, and it would be great to hear what everyone else has been up to.


Hi. My name is Kat. I'm a 42 year old woman who lives with a man who has Dissociative Identity Disorder (7 personalities that he knows of), PTSD, depression, anxiety. We met on a website for mentally ill people. I've been in and out of treatment for 34 years and have been diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder, PTSD, major depression, anxiety. I have my moments, but I take my meds and am in therapy Randy takes meds too, but hasn't been in therapy for years. I thought this relationship with Randy would be good for us, as we're both mentally ill, and so would understand each other. I couldn't have been more wrong. I foolishly let him move in with me last November and it's been a living Hell ever since.
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State of the union

Hey everyone. It's been a while since I posted much of anything, so I thought I'd throw out a little update.
Things have actually been going really well. V's been on a couple med changes over the last...year or so? Not sure exactly. She's more or less got it hammered out at the moment. I'm not sure on dosages but I know she's on Wellbutrin and Lamictal, and that they lowered the lamictal because it was making her foggy and she wanted to think again. Seems like she's found a good balance where she's able to think more clearly, but without the thoughts running wild and bringing her down. She's working on trying to adapt her journals into a narrative of sorts for a potential memoir in the future, which I think is really cool (and I may have had some part in helping inspire, or at least get the motivation up for). We moved into an apartment together last May, which has been really good. Of course, there's always ups and downs, but that's to be expected. So yeah, a bit of good news to perhaps brighten up your days :)

Another source

I hope it's okay to post this here. I see a lot of people who really want support and sometimes don't get many responses here, because there aren't many of us in this community and we don't always know what to say about a specific situation. There are some other message boards at http://p078.ezboard.com/bdepressionfalloutmessageboard that get a lot more traffic and you will always get replies if you post there too. I still think this community is valuable, not saying anything against it, just wanted to post another resource that is available.

My intro

Hi everyone, I just joined this community and read the most recent posts. Like some others of you, I met my boyfriend online. We've only met in person once. We spent 2½ weeks together in February, and right afterwards he was hit with a depressive episode which he is still in. (He has suffered from depression his whole life.)

He is very withdrawn right now and it's particularly hard in an LDR since it means we have no contact. He isn't reading my email or answering the phone. I even sent letters in the mail but he didn't open them. (I found this out because he did pick up the phone and talk to me once, but most of the time he doesn't answer.) So I am having a very hard time, missing him and worried about him, and unsure where to go from here.

We are in a poly relationship. I live with my husband who I've been married to for 20 years. I also have a daughter who has bipolar disorder. She's 18 and has moved away to another state. I didn't join this community to talk about her, so I'll stop there, but I may use my experiences with her to answer other posts occasionally. And I have 3 cats, who are not depressed as far as I know.

I also want to let you guys know about another support forum I found, Depression Fallout, which includes message boards and a very popular chat room. I spend a lot of time there.

Nice to meet you all.

Weekend Community Update - Hello again!


untied was right: it's been quiet in here lately. Even in spite of her brave effort to liven things up a little. (Thank you!) I'm going to take all the blame for that. I haven't invested as much time in this community in the past months as I should have. I won't list my excuses, because they're really not any good, and even less interesting. I would still very much like this community to work the way it was intended to - a place to vent, share, support. We were certainly off to a good start, and I think we have a great group of people here who have been excellent about commenting on the entries that were made so far.

Here's my idea (and you are, of course, free to dismiss it or do whatever you want). I'd really love for every one of our members to post an entry sometime in the next four to six weeks about anything to do with this community's themes. If nothing comes to mind, maybe the community's interests can be of help (to name just a few: humor, stigmatization, responsibility, drug side effects, sex, therapy). And hey, if you really can't, if life has been getting in the way of things, I'm the last person to hold it against you, so don't feel bad. Post whenever you've got the time.


If you aren't a member of wellpartners, but you would like to be, please read the community guidelines. Over the past three months fourteen people have applied for membership by following the 'join this community' link. Nine of these people had friends-only journals. Only three of them sent me an e-mail with a short introduction. These are the only people whose membership I approved. If I don't know who you are, I can't let you in. Trolling has been a problem in this community. Privacy is valued here. So please, if you want to become a member of wellpartners, introduce yourself in an e-mail to the moderator, let us know you're in the right place, and I promise that if you are, you'll be added as a member within three days.


Basically, this place is a free-for-all; you're free to post whenever, whatever, and however, just as long as you play along with the community guidelines. I'd really like to hear any suggestions though concerning where you'd like this place to go. If you expect something in particular from me as your moderator, please let me know. Any ideas about keeping this place alive and involved are very, very welcome. And remember, if you know anyone who you think might benefit from this community, invite them over sometime - they may decide to stick around.

I'd love to hear from you!