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wellpartners
partners of those who suffer from a psychiatric disorder
Hi everybody. I hate to bring bad news, but i really wanted some… 
26th-Oct-2006 02:15 am
red X
Hi everybody. I hate to bring bad news, but i really wanted some feedback from some people who might know. My girlfriend, who I've referred to before by name, but who i'll just call V to keep with the trend here, has been feeling steadily worse over the last couple weeks, and everthing just kind of exploded last night. She was talking about going to the railroad tracks near my apartment, and I made the mistake of trying to restrain her from doing so, which only made things worse. She ended up storming out and coming back with her arm pretty well gashed up from broken glass.It essentially led to us calling her mom, and coming to the decision that she needed to be hosptalized and try to work on getting better in a professional environment. We went that night and they said they had no beds for her, but if we could keep her safe overnight and come back the next morning, she'd get in no problem. We went back the next day and it took a good 9 hours to finally find out whether she'd even be admitted (which we think they only did because they called her psychiatrist and he suggested it) and get her in a room. The problems with this are that without her, I'm miserable, and it's made even worse by the fact that I feel like it's all my fault. I made the call,and the suggestion, so even though we'd been discussing it, it all feels like it fell on my shoulders. I feel like I sent her away, had her locked up, and abandoned her. I know it's for her good, and she said as much, but still...I left her there. Alone. I can't call her or text her, and the fact that I dont drive and will be working makes it hard to get over for a visit. i dont even understand how this works. I dont know how long she'll be gone. I just want it to be a few days, but if her doctor says otherwise...I dont know what to do. i cant do anything. I cant do this. I hate being without her, i hate not being there to help her, I hate myself for what I've done. She's never had to be hospitalized before, although she's been much worse off than she is now. Can anyone offer some insight as to how long these things take, whether we took the right step etc? I just feel so horrible for leaving her there :(
comments 
27th-Oct-2006 07:07 am (UTC)
Yeah, i can totally feel the frustration in those entries :(. There is some good news now though. I got to talk to her again while i was at work and aside from being homesick she seemes to be taking to it rather well. She made a statement about wanting to try to find some self worth, which i told her she deserved because she's amazing. She also mentioned that it's her mission to share something in group tomorrow, which made me happy because she is actively trying at this. Anyway, I again really appreciate your comments, and i'm sure she would too. You helped me out alot. :)
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